Tish's and Arlesia's accidental journey to parenthood introduces uncharted waters into the traditional queer family narrative. After a rocky period in their relationship, Tish became pregnant with their son, Ethan, after a one-night stand. Despite the challenges, they decided to stay together and focus on raising their child. Now, as Ethan grows older, they are facing new transitions and learning to prioritize their own growth as individuals and as a couple. This episode highlights the importance of communication, honesty, and resilience in queer family building. It also emphasizes the need for appreciation, constant connection, and showing up for each other in a relationship. Stay tuned for more enlightening discussions that challenge conventional narratives and celebrate the beautiful diversity of queer families. 🏳️‍🌈Thanks to ⁠Pregnant Together⁠ (code QUEERFAM),  ⁠⁠⁠Our Shelves⁠⁠⁠, and our ⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠ supporters. 🏳️‍🌈Interested in advertising? Check out our packages ⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠ 🏳️‍🌈Key Takeaways:🏳️‍🌈  * Tish and Arlesia's relationship began in college and has endured many trials, emphasizing the strength and resilience of queer relationships. * The couple had a serendipitous journey to parenthood, which included unexpected turns but led to their son Ethan, who they both cherish deeply. * Transparency and growth have been central themes in their relationship, showcasing the importance of honesty and appreciation in a partnership. 🏳️‍🌈Quotes:🏳️‍🌈 * "This is all that matters. Nothing else matters. He is the most important thing.” * "If you love that person enough, you have to show up as your true self every single day." * "Grab the tea, girl. We're going on a journey." 🏳️‍🌈Resources mentioned in the episode:  * Queer midwife Mara Goodman's virtual community: Pregnant Together * Tish and Arlesia on Instagram @meetthewhitakers * 🏳️‍🌈We want to hear from you! 🏳️‍🌈 - Call us and leave a voicemail or text: 646-470-1840 - Email: thequeerfamilypodcast@gmail.com IG/Twitter/FB/TikTok/YouTube: @thequeerfamilypodcast - Website: https://www.thequeerfamilypodcast.com/ - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thequeerfamilypodcast/ - Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ovariestalk/ - TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thequeerfamilypodcast - YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNhon0J_IfFovDUAzS9v2WQ 🏳️‍🌈Order the #ITOCT book Amazon, IndieBound, Audible🏳️‍🌈 https://amzn.to/3F9qRUc 🏳️‍🌈Buy our merch here🏳️‍🌈 https://bit.ly/TQFPmerchandise 🏳️‍🌈Edited by Jerson Barajas. Theme song: Tiffany Topol\ Logo art: Daneen Stevenato🏳️‍🌈 🎙️ Episode Chapters: 00:00: Introduction and Sponsor Message 04:18: Introducing Tish and Arlecia's Story 08:32: Announcing Tish and Arlecia's Story 13:30: Creating a Supportive Community 19:41: Discussing the Desire for Children 22:06: Navigating the Challenges of Building a Queer Family 23:53: Dealing with Infidelity and Unexpected Pregnancy 27:01: Overcoming Infidelity and Building Resilience 28:22: Finding Peace and Moving Forward 29:18: Infidelity and the Decision to Stay Together 30:16: Discovering the Pregnancy and Commitment to Parenting 32:07: Becoming Parents and Embracing the Role 34:02: Dealing with Secrets and Postpartum Challenges 35:54: Navigating Co-Parenting and Maintaining Boundaries 39:36: Uncovering More Secrets and Rebuilding Trust 42:22: Continuing Challenges and Growth in the Relationship 45:12:Appreciating Each Other's Journey and Supporting Growth 50:07: The Importance of Constantly Connecting and Showing Appreciation 54:21: Sharing Their Story and Inspiring Others

Victoria Vega, a yoga instructor and doula, shares her journey into birth work and the importance of addressing generational trauma. As a lesbian, Victoria discusses her decision not to have children but expresses a desire to experience childbirth as a surrogate, highlighting that the desire to carry and the desire to parent can exist independently. This perspective adds a refreshing dimension to the broader narrative about what constitutes a queer family. She emphasizes the significance of chosen family and the support she provides to BIPOC and queer communities. Victoria's work focuses on helping individuals navigate their fears and traumas surrounding pregnancy and birth. Stay tuned for more enlightening discussions that challenge conventional narratives and celebrate the beautiful diversity of queer families. 🏳️‍🌈Thanks to ⁠Pregnant Together⁠ (code QUEERFAM),  ⁠⁠⁠Our Shelves⁠⁠⁠, and our ⁠⁠⁠Patreon⁠⁠⁠ supporters. 🏳️‍🌈Interested in advertising? Check out our packages ⁠⁠⁠here.⁠⁠⁠ 🏳️‍🌈Key Takeaways:🏳️‍🌈  * Victoria Vega's journey into birth work was heavily influenced by family history and an understanding of how trauma is inherited and manifested across generations. * Epigenetics plays a significant role in birth work, as Victoria discusses the impact of generational trauma on her approach to doula services. * The desire to experience childbirth and the desire to become a parent can be separate and independent, which Victoria embodies through her decision not to parent but to potentially become a surrogate. * Surrogacy is presented as a valid and honored choice in the LGBTQIA community, with Victoria advocating for an inclusive and diverse representation of family structures. 🏳️‍🌈Quotes:🏳️‍🌈 * “I would actually love to be a surrogate... I would love to experience the miracle of birth and just going through, like, the way our bodies are just magic." Victoria * "It takes a village to create our families." Victoria * "We make our own families." Victoria * 🏳️‍🌈About The Guest(s)🏳️‍🌈 Victoria Vega is a yoga teacher, meditation facilitator, and full-spectrum doula with a deep commitment to the BIPOC and queer communities. 🏳️‍🌈Resources mentioned in the episode:  * Queer midwife Mara Goodman's virtual community: Pregnant Together https://www.pregnanttogether.com/ * Victoria Vega's Instagram: @vgv.doula_do_yoga * St. Mark's Yoga Classes: https://www.stmarksyoga.com/ * Bridge Directory for Wellness Support: https://thebridgedirectory.com/ * Victoria's Website: vgvdoulayoga.com 🏳️‍🌈We want to hear from you! 🏳️‍🌈 - Call us and leave a voicemail or text: 646-470-1840 - Email: thequeerfamilypodcast@gmail.com IG/Twitter/FB/TikTok/YouTube: @thequeerfamilypodcast - Website: https://www.thequeerfamilypodcast.com/ - Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thequeerfamilypodcast/ - Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ovariestalk/ - TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@thequeerfamilypodcast - YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCNhon0J_IfFovDUAzS9v2WQ 🏳️‍🌈Order the #ITOCT book Amazon, IndieBound, Audible🏳️‍🌈 https://amzn.to/3F9qRUc 🏳️‍🌈Buy our merch here🏳️‍🌈 https://bit.ly/TQFPmerchandise 🏳️‍🌈Edited by Jerson Barajas. Theme song: Tiffany Topol\ Logo art: Daneen Stevenato🏳️‍🌈 🎙️ Episode Chapters: 0:00 Celebrating LGBTQIA Families on the Queer Family Podcast 2:11 Childbirth Desires and Generational Trauma Insights 3:52 Parenting Woes and the Quest for Quiet 6:11 Queer Community, Yoga, and Doula Services Intersect 8:17 Discovering Birth Work Through Personal and Generational Trauma 13:14 The Weight of Generational Trauma in BIPOC Communities 13:56 Exploring the Transformative Journey of Birth Work and Healing 18:48 Defining Family and Personal Choices in Surrogacy and Parenthood 22:27 Victoria's Journey as a Surrogate and Queer-Safe Yoga Instructor #QueerFamilyPodcast #QueerFamilies #LGBTQIAFamilies #QueerMidwife #VirtualCommunity #QueerCommunity #SoloParents #CreatingYourFamily #QueerHost #QueerGuests #QueerPerspective #BirthTrauma #GenerationalTrauma #Doula #YogaInstructor #PrenatalYoga #PostnatalYoga #TraumaInformedYoga #FullSpectrumDoula #Fertility #Surrogacy #ChosenFamily #QueerSafeYoga #ChildbirthEducation #WellnessSupport #Intuition #FollowingYourIntuition #Change #Patreon #BonusContent #SupportTheShow